Letting go
“Relax. Nothing is under control.” – Sophie, Paris
“After a lifetime of exhortations about achievement, accomplishment, tenacity, goals and guts, a gifted physical therapist suggested that I: ‘Just stop.’ Having relentlessly pushed myself in every way for decades, it was a brand new idea that changed my thinking and my life.” – Taylor, Washington, US
“My mum gave me a copy of the poem Desiderata by Max Ehrmann on my 18th birthday. The following section is something that has helped me through some very dark times: ‘Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.’” – Becky, UK
“It’s going to be OK. But it’s going to be different.” – V, Philippines
Recycling wisdom
“I remember my old headteacher once said in assembly: ‘I don’t learn from my mistakes, I learn from other people’s.’” – Ben, Bedfordshire, UK
“From an old married lady to a young single person (hesitant to ever get married). ‘Remember, a good relationship is reciprocal in bettering the other.’” – Shelby, Lake Superior, US
“My mother’s final words to me on her deathbed were: ‘Aren’t we lucky?’ It has been my mantra since.” – Jomie, Devon, UK
What we see depends mainly on what we are looking for
Thinking of others
“You may be the first person to represent a group to another. Always be a good ambassador.” – Agnieszka, Poland
“’Zap’ (recognise ideas, thoughts, people). Don’t ‘sap’ them (dismiss, ignore, exclude, contradict). Build people up, don’t knock them down.” – Kath, Yorkshire, UK
Taking a step at a time
“I’d just completed three years of training in psychodrama. I felt I had done very well and so did my peers. My trainer and supervisor approached me and said: ‘Well done, Philip, that was good enough.’ My colleagues thought he was being mean but I knew what he meant. Stop trying to be perfect and accept you are good enough. I am reminded of this regularly, and it helps, even at the age of 79.” – Philip, Manchester, UK
“Just survive the next five minutes.’ My secondary headteacher was full of little phrases and sayings he liked to use. At this time, I was spinning too many plates: I had to pass my all-important GCSEs, and I was struggling with trying to be ‘the positive’ one in a family greatly affected by my younger sister’s illness. I know my teacher was probably repeating a snippy piece of wisdom he’d found, but the effect of those six words on my life has been immense.” – Ellie, South Korea
My mother’s final words to me on her deathbed were: ‘Aren’t we lucky?’ It has been my mantra since
Trusting in yourself
“’I don’t think Michael has the potential to succeed, he’s better off aiming for more obtainable targets.’ So read a school report during my GCSEs. It was all I needed to achieve a master’s degree, top-middle management position, nationwide workshop leader and work in four continents.” – Michael, Devon
“Aged eight, faced with a decision that seemed huge and seeking mum’s advice, she simply said: ‘You know what to do.’ I’ve forgotten the issue itself, but I haven’t forgotten the intense surge of self-confidence and independence I felt in that moment.” – Kate, Australia
Reframing things
“Exercise is not a punishment. It’s a celebration of your body’s ability to move.”– Julia, Berlin, Germany
“I have multiple sclerosis, it does not have me!”– Shari, Arizona, US
“What we see depends mainly on what we are looking for.” – Drew, Cornwall, UK
Main image: iStock